


life is like a box of sex toys (you never know what you're gonna get)

by Anonymous



Series: Reddie PWPs [2]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Anal Sex, Banter, Bondage, Dildos, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, Fleshlights, Fluff and Smut, Humor, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Power Bottom Eddie Kaspbrak, Praise Kink, Riding, Sex Toys, Submissive Richie Tozier, Top Richie Tozier, Valentine's Day, not formalized d/s but the vibes are there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-12 17:42:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28514406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: “I’m a sexually non-threatening, semi-schlubby, middle-aged gay man. People find me ‘relatable.’ If I tweet about this dildo–” he picks it up by the base and its bulbous head bobs from the movement, “–it’s mostly justfunny, right? And not so obscene to be… not-safe-for-work?”Eddie’s eyes flicker between Richie’s face and the dildo. He’s got a death grip on the oversize bottle of lube. “Well.”“Okay, it’s obscene toyou, but you’re into that kind of thing.”Or, Richie receives a PR box from a sex toy company on Valentine’s Day.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Series: Reddie PWPs [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2116113
Comments: 30
Kudos: 325
Collections: Clowntown Kink Meme 2021





	life is like a box of sex toys (you never know what you're gonna get)

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [clowntown2021](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/clowntown2021) collection. 



> For the new Clowntown Kink Meme! Thank you for the prompt, I had a lot of fun writing this. Hope you enjoy!
> 
>  **Prompt:**  
>  Richie and Eddie hate Valentine’s Day. It’s stupid, fake, and overrated. They normally don’t celebrate, that is until they receive a special package.  
> Or  
> Richie receives a PR box from a sex toy company on Valentine’s Day  
> (Fleshlight handjobs, double sided fleshlights, flavored lubes, plugs, ropes, etc)

“Why would a sex toy company want _you_ as a spokesperson?” 

Richie snorts a laugh. “Wow. Thanks.”

He and Eddie are standing around their kitchen table, where Richie unpacks a PR box replete with a variety of sex toys and related paraphernalia—including a personalized little note, expressing the hope that Richie and his partner will ‘enjoy’ the enclosed. The sentiment makes his skin crawl a little, to be perfectly honest; his deep-seated need for total privacy when it comes to his sexuality has not faded much, even after coming out a little more than a year ago. 

“You know what I mean,” Eddie says. He reaches inside the box to grab a large bottle of lube and inspects the label. He hums approvingly. “You’re a _comedian_.”

“Maybe that’s the appeal,” Richie argues. He picks through the box dispassionately: a set of three silicone butt plugs in graduated sizes; a Fleshlight; a girthy purple dildo, molded veins running up the shaft; a red silk rope, coiled elegantly at the bottom of the box. He raises his eyebrows. Interesting choice for a personalized package. He won’t read into that one too much, not at all. Richie glances back to Eddie and grins. “I’m a sexually non-threatening, semi-schlubby, middle-aged gay man. People find me ‘relatable.’ If I tweet about this dildo–” he picks it up by the base and its bulbous head bobs from the movement, “–it’s mostly just _funny_ , right? And not so obscene to be… not-safe-for-work?” 

Eddie’s eyes flicker between Richie’s face and the dildo. He’s got a death grip on the oversize bottle of lube. “Well.”

“Okay, it’s obscene to _you_ , but you’re into that kind of thing,” Richie says. He flops the dildo toward his face and the heavy tip lands on his lower lip, pulling it down under its weight. 

“Need to wash these first,” Eddie mutters, staring at Richie’s mouth. Richie starts to open his lips around the head, realizing with a thrill how _thick_ it is—and Eddie swats at his arm. “Stop that. I’m gonna clean these.”

• • •

Eddie washes everything in the bathroom sink with mild soap, while Richie stands leaning in the doorframe, watching and not helping. Eddie’s been delightfully pink-cheeked ever since they started unpacking the goodies, and Richie has to admit there’s something erotic about watching Eddie roll up his sleeves and rub soapy hands over phallic objects.

It’s Valentine’s Day, their second together, and they were not planning on doing much of anything to celebrate. They don’t need an overrated cheesy holiday to tell them what to do. Neither of them are into gifts or flowers or chocolates and they like to go out to dinner, but they can do that any other day of the year without competing with all of LA for a table. Last year, their relationship was still new so everything was fresh and exciting together, no matter what they did. Eddie had spent his past several Valentine’s Days desperately trying to please his now-ex-wife, who was never happy with anything he did, whether gifts or restaurant reservations. Every year inevitably led to some petty fight. So Eddie and Richie set the bar low on purpose, leading up to their first romantic holiday together; neither would buy gifts for each other, and they would stay in, eat some take out, watch a movie, and have sex that would be maybe more involved and longer lasting than their usual routine, if they had the patience for it. 

This year, they were planning on the same thing. And they still are, but the sudden proliferation of sex toys in their possession might have an impact on the course of the day. 

Eddie sticks the wet dildo onto the counter, where its base immediately suctions onto the surface, lazily swaying back and forth. Richie reaches to flick it, to keep it going, like one of those inflatable waving tube-guys outside of a used car dealership. 

“Cute,” Eddie comments dryly, and turns his attention to the Fleshlight. There’s an instructional pamphlet for this one, which he’s squinting at, brow furrowed. 

“You’ve been turned on since we opened the box,” Richie accuses, grinning. “Is that why you’re in such a rush to clean everything?” 

“You’re the one who can’t see a dick without putting it in your mouth,” Eddie snaps back. His face is red now, even though he’s making an effort to scowl, as he keeps examining the Care & Cleaning section of the pamphlet. “Says it can’t be cleaned with _any_ soap, just water.”

“They didn’t send me one that looks like a pussy,” Richie muses, reaching to poke his finger in the anatomically neutral hole. “Thoughtful of them. Oh, it’s so soft. You ever tried one of these?” 

“I have not,” Eddie says, staring at where Richie’s finger fucks into the hole. “Let me rinse that off.” 

“And then what?” Richie asks, smirking. 

“And, um.” Eddie works quickly, running water through and over the toy. “Then I’ll let you use it on me.” 

“Oh, you’ll _let_ me use it on you. Yeah, you’re doing me a _big_ favor, Eds,” Richie says, stepping closer to him, to crowd him against the bathroom counter. “I think that’s clean enough. They don’t come pre-fucked, you know.” 

“I know,” Eddie mutters, and lets Richie take the Fleshlight out of his hand. He turns away from the sink and Richie immediately sees that he’s tenting his pajama pants. 

“God, you’re so hot,” Richie says, dropping to his knees in the bathroom. He lands on the fluffy rug, which cushions his joints, but barely. “Standing here, washing all our new toys, getting off on it.” He palms Eddie’s dick through his sweatpants, squeezing him. 

“I wasn’t getting _off_ on it,” Eddie argues, pedantically. Richie fucking loves him. “But the– _ah_ – the anticipation is…” 

“Yeah, cleaning’s your foreplay, I get it.” Richie pulls Eddie’s pants and underwear down, freeing his dick, which bobs up, head red and glistening. “And you like making _me_ wait for it.” 

Richie doesn’t like making Eddie wait for it, though, not really, so he sucks the tip into his mouth right away. 

Eddie gasps and squirms, one hand clutching the bathroom counter and the other fisted against Richie’s shoulder. “Jesus, Rich, I’m… If you want me to come in the toy and not down your throat, you should probably…” 

Richie pulls off and reaches for the lube, which sits on the counter. “Yeah, but you’re never gonna want my mouth again after this. Thought I’d get it one last time.” 

Eddie chuckles, watching Richie as he pours a bit of lube into the palm of his hand and then rubs it over Eddie’s cock, already slick with built-up pre-come. “No way this is gonna be better than your mouth.” 

“You’d be surprised.” Richie lifts up the Fleshlight now; it’s heavy and solid in his hand. “The machines are gonna steal my job.” 

He slowly eases the sleeve around Eddie’s cock, and his reaction is immediate and gratifying. 

“Oh, fuck,” he gasps, hips jerking forward a bit like he can’t help it. He grips Richie’s shoulder. “That _is_ soft.” 

Richie keeps sliding it forward until he’s fully sheathed. “Better than my mouth?”

Eddie appears thoughtful for a moment. Then he says, “No.”

“Aw,” Richie says, genuinely a bit touched.

“Because you can talk during this,” Eddie elaborates, cracking a grin. 

Richie’s expression turns indignant, and Eddie laughs. 

“I’m kidding,” Eddie says, and shifts his hips forward, rocking into Richie’s grip. “Now come on.”

Richie doesn’t move, playfully petulant. “No. If all you want is a silent hole to fuck then be my guest. Show me what you got.” He lifts up his other hand to hold the Fleshlight in place, keeping it perfectly still and raising his eyebrows in a challenge. 

“Somebody can’t take a joke,” Eddie mutters, but he draws back, halfway out, before he snaps his hips forward again. He groans at the sensation of the luscious inhuman skin sliding over him. 

“Yeah, that’s it, babe,” Richie encourages. He’s not gonna stay silent because fuck Eddie. (Anyway, if Eddie really _did_ want Richie to stay quiet, he should choke him about it. Richie wouldn’t be opposed.) “I wanna see you fuck this like I’m not even here.” 

Eddie holds onto the edge of the counter with one hand, leaning forward a bit, eyes screwed shut. He thrusts a few more times, quick and solid movements that really test Richie’s ability to hold the toy still. He readjusts his grip, bracing against Eddie. 

“Yeah, that’s so fucking hot. Love seeing you like this,” Richie says. Eddie’s leaning over him now, his thrusts backing Richie up against the wall. Visually, it’s like Eddie’s fucking his mouth, but with a kind of reckless abandon he has never actually turns on any of Richie’s holes. Richie’s aching hard in his pants and can’t even touch himself since he needs both hands to hold the Fleshlight in place; he squeezes his thighs together. “You can use this when I’m away on tour,” Richie says, and Eddie whines a little, clearly close to the edge already. “As long as you tell me when you do, so I can get myself off, thinking about it.” 

A few more hard thrusts, Richie backed up against the wall and the Fleshlight pushed above his shoulder, and Eddie comes, going still. 

“Oh my god,” Eddie says, catching his breath. “Wow. That’s a good, uh…”

“A good product?” Richie smirks. “Gets five stars from you? Gonna write a review?” 

“Maybe I will,” Eddie says. He puts his hand over Richie’s to hold the sleeve in place while he slowly pulls out. “Gotta clean this then it’s your turn.” 

Richie stays sitting on the floor, dick throbbing in anticipation, while Eddie lovingly cleans his new favorite hole.

• • •

The two of them regroup and meet in the bedroom after a few minutes, the selection of toys spread out on the sheets next to them on the large bed. They’ve slipped out of their clothes, too, but Eddie seems unsympathetic toward Richie’s erection, considering he hasn’t touched it or barely looked at it yet. Richie squeezes himself around the root while Eddie asks him what piques his interest, like he’s a sales associate at a sex shop.

“Well.” Richie looks at the toys, suddenly feeling embarrassed. He gets uncomfortable and self-conscious when it’s all about him, when Eddie’s already come and all the attention gets turned on Richie. He has no problem doing things that are just for Eddie, but the inverse makes him nervous. 

“You seemed interested in this earlier,” Eddie says, picking up the purple dildo. “Maybe you can sit on this while I suck you off?” 

Jesus. Eddie’s blunt demeanor makes Richie’s brain go to static sometimes. And that _does_ sound appealing, but…

Richie’s eyes flicker to the red rope again, which Eddie hasn’t mentioned or given more than a fleeting glance. “I’m kind of interested in…”

“In this?” Eddie reaches for it, holding the thick velvety material in his hand. He grins at Richie. “Me or you?” 

“Me, if that’s okay,” Richie says. 

Eddie rolls his eyes fondly, and mimics Richie’s low mumbling voice: “If that’s okay… Yeah, it’s okay.” The familiar teasing sets Richie at ease. “What if I, um…” Eddie looks thoughtfully at the rope, tests it by winding it around one of his own wrists. “What if I tie your hands together and ride you?” 

Richie blinks, and his whole body flushes, almost unbearably hot. “Um, yeah. Please.” 

“Great.” Eddie springs forward to kiss him, once then twice. “Let’s do that.” 

Eddie’s never tied anybody up before, but he was, however briefly, a Boy Scout, so he knows how to tie structurally sound knots. 

Richie resists squirming, arms held over his head, while Eddie straddles him, tying his wrists together. He looking _very_ focused, biting his lower lip. “I don’t wanna go too tight, I guess,” Eddie says, tugging at the knot. “How does that feel?” 

“Good,” Richie says. He pulls, but he can’t get out of it. His heart pounds in his chest. 

“Your arms look so good like this,” Eddie comments, smoothing one hand over a bicep. Eddie’s hard again now and Richie’s barely been touched which is, honestly, really doing it for him.

Eddie shifts down Richie’s body and reaches for the lube, slicking up his fingers. When he reaches between his legs to finger himself, he looks at Richie. 

“You’re being quiet. All good?” 

Richie nods. His mouth feels dry, but he tries to explain what it is he likes about this. “Yeah, I’m good. I like the feeling that you’re… using me.” 

Eddie’s eyes narrow in understanding. He’s still prepping himself, two fingers twisting into his hole, but he’s all business, barely reacting to it, other than the slight strain around the corners of his mouth. 

“Oh, I see,” Eddie says. “You like that even though you got all these toys for me I still just wanna fuck myself on your fat cock.” 

Richie’s hips buck, totally involuntarily, and Eddie smiles, self-satisfied. 

“I don’t mind that you talk a lot during sex, by the way,” Eddie says, his expression going more serious. “That _was_ a joke earlier. You always talk me off so well.”

Richie already feels so overwhelmed and _no one_ is touching his dick. He jerks his hips up again, rubbing against the inside of Eddie’s thigh; he moans low in his throat. 

“But if you want to stay quiet sometimes, that’s okay, too,” Eddie tells him, and finally reaches behind to grab his dick. Richie squirms, bucking into his grasp, while Eddie strokes him, quick and firm to spread the lube. “Hold still for me,” Eddie says, and Richie does, instantly dropping back flat to the mattress. His arms are tense, he realizes; he’s gripping his hands together above his head. “Good boy,” Eddie praises, smiling a little, and he finally sinks down on his cock.

Eddie’s body is tight and hot, and Richie can tell he’s showing off a little, taking him in one smooth slide before he’s completely ready for it. Not that Richie minds the show, but it does take all his willpower to stop from moving. Eddie huffs, wincing, and Richie’s arms strain against the silky rope. 

No sooner is Eddie fully seated than he starts moving, lifting back up, the clench of his body so tight that Richie’s hips lift slightly with him. “I love this part, at the beginning,” Eddie says, rocking his hips. “You feel so big, stretching me out.” 

He leans back, supporting himself with a hand on Richie’s thigh, until he seems to hit the angle he’s looking for. His mouth falls open on a gasp. 

Richie feels transfixed, staring at Eddie above him, the mesmerizing movement of his body that gradually speeds up, until he’s fucking himself in earnest. 

Eddie’s breathing heavily now, panting out little sounds, as he works his thighs. “Fuck, Richie, you’re just… _taking_ it, you’re so good. You would let me do anything I want. Let me use your dick like a…”

He pauses, an idea clearly occurring to him as he twists around to grab the dildo from the selection of neglected sex toys next to them in bed. He leans forward, still rocking his hips, and holds the blunt head of the dildo against Richie’s lips. 

“Suck it.” 

Richie opens his mouth eagerly, taking in the thick silicone cock to rest heavy on his tongue. 

“Yeah, fuck, Richie, you look so good like that,” Eddie says, and he sounds wrecked. He’s barely bouncing anymore, just grinding back on Richie’s dick, as he starts to jerk himself off with his free hand. 

Richie realizes now how truly powerless he is, and his pulse jumps at the thought. He can’t take the dildo out of his mouth, he can’t speak, he can barely move with Eddie’s weight pinning him down. He’s drooling from the corner of his mouth, and he’s definitely _close_ , his balls tight and heavy. If he could get in a few good thrusts he could finish himself off right now, but he can’t. He just has to lie here and let Eddie have his way with him. 

This is going to be a big thing for him, Richie can already tell. Whoever threw that rope in the box… good instincts.

“I’m close,” Eddie says, and he lifts up on his knees, pulling almost all the way off. “Richie, fuck me.”

Richie doesn’t need to be told twice. He scrambles to get his feet flat on the mattress for leverage and jerks his hips up, practically sobbing with the instant relief he feels when he thrusts fast and hard into Eddie. 

When Eddie comes a moment later, he loses his grip on the dildo so it falls from Richie’s mouth, rolling onto his chest, tracking saliva. Eddie leans back, moaning as he spills into his hand. 

Quiet sounds fall from Richie’s mouth as he works his hips for a few more seconds; with a final thrust up, he comes so hard his vision goes white behind closed eyelids. 

In the aftermath, Richie slowly melts into the mattress, his limbs loose and relaxed. He barely feels the restraints on his wrists anymore. Eddie doesn’t climb off right away, letting Richie start to go soft inside him as he leans forward to kiss his face and untie his hands. 

“You did so well,” Eddie tells him. “That was fucking amazing.” 

Richie doesn’t move his hands even though they’re free now; he doesn’t think he _can_ move, he’s so tired and happy. “Need to do a post for that company.” 

Eddie snorts, settling in next to Richie in bed. “You work so hard. My Instagram influencer.” He kisses his shoulder.

“Twitter,” Richie mumbles. “Fuck you.” 

“Should I just take a photo of you like this?” Eddie asks. “You look like you got hit by a train. That’s the best endorsement there is.” 

Richie hums. “If you want one for yourself, go for it. But no fucking way I’m posting that.”

Eddie strokes his chest. “Maybe we have a new Valentine’s Day tradition.” 

“Fucking the shit out of each other?” 

Eddie laughs. “Well, yeah, but. We should pick out something new each year and try it together. How does that sound?” 

Richie smiles lazily. He’s gonna be out cold in a few more seconds. “That sounds good,” he says. “I think I like Valentine’s Day now.”


End file.
